Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Body hydrotherapy

My husband drives a Mini-cooper. I drive a little truck. Both vehicles are shared - we grab the keys to either one when running errands, but for our daily commute E has the Mini, I have the little truck. Dogs ride in either/both... and both vehicles have the dog fur and muddy paw prints to prove it.

So I was surprised when E received a slightly perfumed envelope in the mail offering a 'complete beautifying body hydrotherapy' to keep his sleek body performing... spa services 'down to every last knob in the cockpit.' In household speak, this offer raised my eyebrow. Yet it was just an offer for a car wax, detailing, and vacuum at the Mini dealer.

On the same day, I receive a post card with a photo of a grime-covered, muddy truck bouncing through slush. The card reminds me that my 'work horse is due for its year end overhaul.' My rugged suspension and strong powerful engine (a 4 cylinder, in my case) are due a complete inspection and adjustment,and if needed, replacement, all with factory replacement parts at cost. "Ready to harness the road ahead with more torque than the competition."

Hmmm. These ads seem to be addressed to the wrong people in this household! But on further review, maybe not. What guy doesn't like a slightly perfumed letter with promises to keep his sleek body performing...?

And me? Oh yea, replace my worn parts with factory originals. Can we start with the skin around my eyes? These little laugh lines just HAVE TO GO! I want smooth baby soft skin there again. My hair? I'd love my soft strawberry blond curls back - the ones that faded to this mousy brown wavy stuff that thinks I can even get a comb through it... Now wisdom teeth - keep them. I don't want the originals back. But can you really do anything about my sagging suspension?

And while you are at it, Mr. Mini Cooper detailer, be sure to get the dog fur out from UNDER the seats. UNDER, ok? And polish the outside door locks, too!


altadenahiker said...

Go for the torque!

Gus, Louie and Callie said...

Now that is a real deal, go for it..
The Red Heelermobile could use some of that.. Dad thinks the car wash people always take a bread when they see him coming.. Just a little, mud, fur, sheep aroma?

Big Sloppy Kisses
Gus, Louie and Callie

BANJO52 said...

Thanks for the smiles. Those mini Coopers are fetching little buggers, aren't they. I've liked the looks of 'em since the first Bourne movie.

Cafe Pasadena said...

Have a Happy Festivus, BA!